This Grandma must admit that I can hug and kiss each grandchild a lot longer than the grandchild wants to be hugged and kissed and tolerates my hugging and kissing them. I thought and thought and came up with the Octopus Game. I have started with a grandchild as young as two who is the second sibling and watches the first and says, “me too.” My oldest grandchild was three when I started with just my arms around him in a hug.
It started by accident. I was hugging and kissing my oldest grandchild longer than he wanted and he was trying to get out of my arms. I said, “wait.” “Imagine my hands and legs are hands and legs of an octopus and you must try to get away from the octopus. He loved it. And of course, I got in extra hugs and kisses.
So, now my grandchildren actually ask me to octopus them. I wrap my arms and legs around them just enough to make it a challenge to get out. Part of the deal is that grandma gets to hug and kiss the grandchild until he or she is able to escape. See, this is a great secret way to get extra hugs and kisses.
It is also a great teaching opportunity. How complex the octopusing gets depends on the age of the child. With the youngest child, I might only wrap my arms around them loosely and let them squirm out. With the ten year old, I get down on the floor and wrap my arms and legs around his arms and legs. Yes, it does help that I am a yogi, but anyone can do this. However, at ten, even using brains, we are near the end of this game as he is stronger than me!
Of course, the first reaction of the grandchild is to try to use force to make grandma let go. I have taught them a saying, “stop, try to use your brain rather than your brawn.” I explain the difference. I teach them to think of a plan to escape. I teach them to use their brains rather than brawn to find an escape route and of course hugging tighter if they use brawn and facilitating their plan and loosening my grip if they use their brains. I loved hearing them tell me of their plan and how they used their brains instead of their brawn.
The best was when I asked the six year old grandson a question recently, and his response ended with, “. . . .and, of course, I used my brain.”
Joy,
Mema
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