It seems that many Hollywood stars are in the baby way for the second time.
In the Sun Sentinel, April 27, 2016, it was reported that Kevin Jonas and his wife, Danielle, announced they are expecting baby number two. On Twitter, they shared a picture of Kevin reading “What to Expect When You’re Expecting Again,” with the caption, “Prepping for baby number two,” who will join their first child, Alena Rose, age 2.
In People Magazine, May 2, 2016, in “More Hollywood Baby News,” there were four more couples working on their second child. The quotes were priceless. Eva Mendes and Ryan Gosling were described as being very hands on and wanting their children to grow up as normal as possible, adding a second to Esmeralda, age 19 months. I wonder what Eva Mendes’ and Ryan Gosling’s definition of normal is! Megan Fox, and her “formerly estranged husband,” Brian Austin Green, “just months after she filed for divorce, “ are expecting their third, living together again and excited about having this baby join sons Noah, age 3, and Bodhi, age 2. That is what this Grandma calls Hollywood normal. Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds have a 16 month old daughter, James, and are thrilled to be expecting baby number two. We, in our extended family, also have interesting and unusual names, so Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds naming their daughter James, may now be the new normal. I cannot wait to read in People what their second child is named. Olivia Wilde and Jason Sudeikis have a two year old son, Otis, and showed a picture of her belly and the two year olds’. Of course, everyone in our family looks as good pregnant as Olivia Wilde.
These Hollywood parents-to-be are all beautiful people. . . busy with their careers. As such, that makes them very much like the beautiful parents of our grandchildren and grandchildren-to-be. Every family in this parenting generation seems contain two working parents, whether Hollywood stars or not. This Grandma bets that they, too, do not realize that having two children is more work than double one. So, when prepping for baby number two, we grandmas must go into action. . . or not.
PREPARING THE FIRST GRANDCHILD FOR BABY NUMBER TWO
However the parents of our first grandchild prepare him or her for the second, we cannot interfere. The parents of our grandchildren are perfect in every way and we do not criticize anything they say or do. Remember to honor the gatekeepers, the parents of our grandchildren, who control the access to our precious grandchildren.
But we grandmas can do more. When our oldest grandson, at age three, was unhappy when baby number two came along because she could do nothing but eat or sleep, I explained how one day she was going to be able to play with him and he would be so happy. Yes, that came to pass, and I reminded him. Every time he shared a concern or disappointment, I found a silver lining to share that would come sooner than he could then realize. Every time someone brought a baby present and did not bring a small token gift for him, I went to my pre-planned stash of small wrapped gifts that I could compensate with quickly and without a blink of an eye.
BEING THERE FOR BABY NUMBER ONE AND AN EXTRA PAIR OF HANDS WHEN THE NEWBORN ARRIVES
Of course, we have the time to spoil the first when the parents are busy and tired and overwhelmed with the second newborn. That is our first role. We concentrate on the first and allow them to concentrate on the second. Our second role is to take over with the second so the parents can concentrate on the first. Sometimes, we have to remind the parents of the grandchildren that the second does not know who is holding and caring for him or her. If we wear a t-shirt that has been worn by the mother, the newborn’s sense of smell brings comfort to the baby thinking we are the mother. Yes, it is okay to remind the parents that the father should have the mother wear his t-shirt that he can then wear with the same result. We are there for baby number two by making sure he or she feels calm and secure in this way. We are there for the new family by having the father be able to more easily calm the newborn too and be positively involved in the newborn’s care.
COOKING AND CLEANING AND DOING LAUNDRY
This Grandma cooks extra meals to go into the freezer for after I leave, cleans and does the laundry to free the parents to become a new unit, without these additional chores to exhaust already exhausted parents. If I am too exhausted, I know that I too, like the movie stars, can pay for extra help for the new family within my means.
It may be that the Hollywood stars can afford to pay hired help to do most of what we grandparents can do, but, if they are lucky, they too have grandparents to come and be there for the entire new family. We have enormous amounts of love in our hearts, and the old and new babies in our souls. What we do comes with a tremendous dose of pride in helping build a strong future family in which our grandchildren will thrive.
READING AND LEARNING THE NEW PARENTING WAYS
We grandparents must remember to do as the parents say in all things. Of course, we can do extra spoiling without their knowledge. I have always found it important to read what they read and learn what they are learning, so we do not seem as old fashioned as they think we are. If Kevin Jonas or the parent of our grandchildren are reading the newest edition of “What to Expect When You’re Expecting Again,” we should too. And, better yet, if they do not yet own the book, share your copy!
Maybe I should have titled this blog post, “Prepping For Baby Number Two As The Hollywood Stars Wish They Could Do.”
Joy,
Mema
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