This Grandma loved the editorial by Phil Latzman, “A Genuine Work of Art? Try 60 Years of Marriage,” in the Sun Sentinel, July 17, 2014. It is about his in-laws who just celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary, “an event so precious, 60 years is known as the ‘Diamond Anniversary’.”
For someone just trying to wrap my head around being at the tail end of the sixties in age, 60 years of marriage truly is hard to comprehend. It seems it is also hard to achieve in our society. Mr. Latzman writes, “ [a]ccording to the most recent U.S. Census Bureau statistics, only about 5 percent of married couples ever achieve even a 50th anniversary.”
His mother-in-law said she wondered where the years went, that the secret of being married for 60 years is that you not only have to be a little insane, but have patience, tolerance, and a sense of humor. His father-in-law said the key is love, affection, and stability, that life is constantly in flux and at least you have a stable marriage. He added, after an argument, let it go, no brooding. His mother-in-law admitted there were times that they wanted to kill each other.
The generation from which Mr. Latzman’s in-laws come married young. He said his mother-in-law was 18 and his father-in-law was 21 and just back from Korea. They raised three daughters and ran successful businesses, and scrimped and saved – – -and of course are retired in Florida. Mr. Latzman said their life wasn’t easy, but in his view, “they are the American Dream personified.”
Mr. Latzman’s wife “calls her parents’ six decades of matrimony, “The Art of Marriage.” Indeed, it is a rare artwork that should be appreciated,” he says.
This Grandma agrees. Marriage is hard work and we should learn from those who survive and thrive in long term coupling. There are good times and bad times in life and somehow having that partner makes the bad times easier, unless the partner is the cause of the bad times, which may also happen. This Grandma once heard a saying that marriage is falling in love many times, always with the same person.
As people marry later now, attaining 60 years of marriage will surely be a large hurdle. This Grandma thinks the real key to marriage longevity is commitment. Whatever the hurdle, appreciate that there are those who have made a lifetime commitment, kept that commitment, and made their marriage work and thrive. It IS possible to do so with
Joy,
Mema
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