This Grandma read the book, “The Red Tent,” but does not remember it, other than the book being enthralling at the time. Now watching the movie version on Lifetime, I still do not remember the story, and the movie is also enthralling. Not to kill the story for you, there is a scene in it in which adult men agree to circumcision and the aftermath. It is not pretty.
Then, I read a story in the Miami Herald, December 9, 014, “Circumcision Benefits Outweigh Risks,” about a draft of federal guidelines from health officials released which indicates that scientific evidence supports recommending the procedure, according to the author, Bill Berkrot. He says that the circumcision rate has declined 10% from 1979 to 2010 to 58%, and says:
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention found that medically performed male circumcision could help decrease the risk of contracting HIV and several other sexually transmitted diseases as well as other health problems.
He says the procedure has been the subject of debate and describes the debate as “fierce.” It seems that the CDC guidelines note that the procedure is “simpler safer, and less expensive for newborns and infants than adult males.” Yes, the guidelines also suggest, according to Mr. Berkrot, “waiting for a boy to reach his teen years or even adulthood affords him the chance to make the decision for himself.”
Really? Teenagers make such good decisions overall? Aren’t the teenage years fraught with poor decision-making, poor judgment, risk taking and other bad behaviors? Is there a teenager who listens to his or her parents? Is such advice in the guidelines as a means for the CDC to avoid being part of a “fierce’ debate?
Getting back to the movie of “The Red Tent,” any male who is old enough to watch the movie would be mortified and horrified to see the consequences portrayed in the movie to the adult males of having circumcision as adults. Although the CDC fact sheet says that “the overall risk of adverse events associated with male circumcision is low, with minor bleeding and inflammation cited as the most common complications, “ I would be hard-pressed to think of an adult male who voluntarily wants to suffer any of those consequences “down there.”
WebMd also waffles about recommendation of circumcision universally and mentions the benefits of circumcision, including:
A decreased risk of urinary tract infections.
A reduced risk of some sexually transmitted diseases in men.
Protection against penile cancer and a reduced risk of cervical cancer in female sex partners.
Prevention of balanitis (inflammation of the glans) and balanoposthitis (inflammation of the glans and foreskin).
Prevention of phimosis (the inability to retract the foreskin) and paraphimosis (the inability to return the foreskin to its original location).
What all of the waffling fails to address is that the first responsibility a parent has to their child is to make decisions in their best interests. A decision that affects the wellbeing of a newborn is best made when the newborn is still in utero. Once the newborn is in arms of the parents, decisions such as circumcision should already have explored, researched, discussed with the pediatrician, and been made.
Since most parents know the sex of the child before birth, the dialogue should start immediately upon learning that the child is a male, not only about name but about any health procedures that should be considered, such as circumcision of a male newborn. The procedure is recommended for newborn males, not only for their health, but the future health of their future partner. It is all the waffling that comes after the recommendation in favor of circumcision of a newborn that is so confusing. But isn’t that what typically happens when avoiding ‘fierce’ debate seems to be the goal?
The Red Tent mass circumcision is fiction but the consequences are real because the reality is that circumcision benefits outweigh the risks. Maybe grandma bringing up the issue may cause fierce debate among the family, but then bring up exploration, research, discussion with the pediatrician and a cost-benefit analysis based on knowledge. We, as grandmas, do not have the responsibility of parenting, but we are experienced parents who have a responsibility to be parenting mentors on decision-making to the parents-to-be of our precious grandchildren. It is their ultimate decision, not ours. We just await grand parenting
Joy,
Mema
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